10 Minutes to 2007

At this perfect juncture, a road down memory lane, and as I count the many blessings of God, I find myself being dragged deeper into the bog of reminiscence. Like the numerous stars in the sky, so God has blessed us all abundantly this year.

The television set drones outside - countdown to the new year 2007 - the new year party - the foam party - 'Are you ready!!!?' - time for quiet reflection, in the midst of such activity.

(10, 9 , 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, HAPPY NEW YEAR! *insert happy music here*)

This was a year of great change. Our last year as GEPs, our last year together as a class - such was how it began, and why we set our hearts on making this a year to remember - and we did - we did.

Who can forget Kluang: feet caked with dry mud, tents that leaked, campsite next to the lake, lakewater for bathing - and most importantly - precious time with friends. Oh how we endured the camp together, tumbled into the water together as the raft capsized, formed the human chains together (bare-bodied and no-holds-barred) and chatted our way into dreamland every night. Oh such memories, what a childhood (or teenage-hood rather) to remember!

And the soccer sessions every day. Sweat that plastered our shirts upon our bodies, and the post-bell rush to make it on time to class (we were always tardy), the many strange and exciting times we had on the field, and the radical shift from basketball court soccer to astro-style soccer. Bonding through soccer - yet another unforgettable change.

For BB, it too was a year of change, the company turned upside down, everything was altered. We were lost, but soon the sense of direction was regained, and we worked toward a more spiritually-centered Boys' Brigade. I for one was radically changed, and I felt tremendous joy watching the BB change before my eyes. The return of many formers officers (and the coming of many new officers) injected new life into the company. It was a painful separation from the old - definitely - but the future was definitely bright.

MCYC camp, the planning saw the formation of an accountability group. And there I was, and it was on a fine day after NYAA logging where everything changed and I revealed my terrible struggle to someone else other than God. Hesistant, but eventually firmly, I dragged the closet sin into the light, and let it melt. It was a decision I never regretted. About that sin, I thank God that He has led me through an entirely year without it! Hallelujah to the Lamb of God, who covers us in his blood and takes upon himself all our iniquities!

Mission trip. Another life changing experience. In a moment, I was hit by the great need around me, not only in Khon Kaen, but in Singapore, at home, and just everywhere. It was a time to renew and soften the heart, a time for compassion, and to discover the true meaning of Christianity - to care for the lost, the widows, the sick. To minister love and to experience great joy in return!

Church camp. That meeting with the mother church - where finally parting was such sweet sorrow. Where I experienced God with great emotion, was touched and saw others being touched, a grand display of God's power and might. Also, our own FPP camp, and all the new X-change program youth. Jemimah also coming this year as a result of TRACing. What a difference, What growth that God has blessed us with. We only hope that every individual will continue to grow in favor with God and men - to become more Christlike!

Girls in school. And next year in class. Exciting prospect to be honest. New experiences to come, look forward to it my friends - but don't overemphasize it :).

Mdm Loo's crisis (as Sean pointed out) was another big point this year. As we prayed over her in Chinese (that was sure difficult), God ministered peace to our hearts. I'm sure that because of this crisis, Mdm Loo will slowly grow to know God one day, and come to the knowledge of His saving grace. Amazing grace, how sweet the sound!

And in and around the world many things have changed as well. Saddam hanged (latest news). Democrats increasing in power. World Cup 2006. North Korea's nuclear crisis (perhaps not so new), Middle East crisis. So much change - and everything is moving so rapidly. Yet in such a rapidly moving world, God reminds us to Be still and know Him.

And that would conclude this post. That in this new year we choose to learn to know Him. To be still and know that He is God, and that he will be exalted throughout the universe. To learn the fear of the Lord, reverently commiting ourselves to his holiness, knowing that we are nothing and he is everything. And trusting him to hear our prayers and heal our land.

2007 has come. Please Lord, follow us into it!

Sunny Singapore (Part 5)

and we've finally arrived at the final day. The day of rest. The day of the dreaded return bus ride to bangkok. I'm finished yay!

Ping Pong
not the girl. the game. R&R time for (what else) rest. Took long to find something to do. Some went to Fairy Plaza, others went to sleep (Mr Khoo screamed at me!!), some went to dip in the (ice-cold) swimming pool and jumped out dancing comically and I went to the hotel piano with Tim Liang only to be chased away. So I decided to pay the table tennis table a visit.

Sorely under-practiced, I picked up the bat in classic Korean attacking style - the pencil grip - and pitted myself against people far past my calibre (most notably Daryl, who packs a large smashing punch). They consoled me, but who plays for consolation. (Daryl was table tennis king, even Charles succumbed to the maniacal laughter)

Eventually, I reclined to the newbie table, and Wes and I played one another, barely making it past 4 returns every serve. Yang Jian and Desmond completed the newbie quartet later on. And we went on to gain experience and level up together. By the end of the (close to four hour) session, we were smashing, and playing more like proper table tennis players.

The dancers behind us had a great time dodging our misplaced shots, and were always politely (though one could tell they were annoyed) picking up and returning our balls.

well. we had fun. and next was the much awaited bus ride back.

GrassLand Xpress
well, it wasn't that good. But the bus ride was much better compared to the previous one. Reclining seats, and less cold aircon meant that we could get some shuteye (arguably, it might have been due to sheer exhaustion, or overdose of ping pong). Next to the very warm Mr Azmi, I slept quite perfectly that night.

only to awake in Bustling Bangkok (wow. Amazing alliteration!)

Bustling Bangkok
the atmosphere there was worlds apart from the suburban Khon Kaen city. Cars, Carbon Monoxide, Crowds, the whole ruckus one would expect from a modern city. Flyovers, road signs, felt like Singapore, but with many more people, and lots more noise.

the hotel was a little eerie (I must confess). The long corridors and all were enough to unnerve me even in broad daylight (more so in the night). As Alf (yes...my beloved roommate who I have yet to mentioned) and I prayed over the room, I felt a strange feeling of peace from the Lord. Great, at least God was there, and it made all the difference.

and we crashed a suite that morning - a suite which we had not booked in advance. We did get reprimanded later...:P. But well.

(I'll make this short...dinner beckons)

MBK
the much awaited MBK shopping mall. It was quite large (hints of VivoCity!), and quite crowded, and they used coupons for eating.

The main highlight was the movie Eragorn - which in my opinion, aside from being a close adaptation (putting it very nicely) of LOTR - wasn't too bad. At least there were fire-breathing dragons and pretty faces. And at least there were practical lessons learnt: Heros are chosen not for their appearance but for their hearts!

Shopping for 2 hours didn't yield much - but there were many things going for unspeakable prices (to begin with, the movie had cost S$4). And of course there was Jun Wei continually pointing out to me the women who were not actually women (right here, I expect most people to understand what I'm talking about - except those squeaky clean innocent ones).

and we had to go back for a meeting with Auntie Dorothy.

(I'm posting so scrappily now...)

Auntie Dorothy
the donuts were tasty.

we shared our reflections for the trip with Auntie Dorothy that afternoon. I remembering sharing that this had been a trip of definitions. Of seeking God for the answer to what was 'desperation', and what was 'love' and 'compassion'. Up till now I'm still seeking, and perhaps I've discovered a little, but there's a lot more to go - while on earth we will never see the complete picture, but when Jesus returns...hoho.

It was then I felt the call to ministry in Thailand. But it might have been just an impression, not a Spirit-given one. And such impressions are hard to discern, and that's why prayer is essential.

Please speak to me God.

Mr Azmi went strange at that point in time.

Mr Azmi's Silence
He was strangely silent, squatting in the corner outside his hotel room. The usually bubbly Mr Azmi sad-faced and troubled was not a pretty sight. Suddenly, he grew quiet, introvertive and closed up. Something was up. I thank God that He managed to lend a listening ear through me. Not my glory but God's.

Still remember that talk from the roadside mee stall, to my hotel room (with Alf snoozing at one corner), and finally to Kenneth's room for fried banana pancakes (of which i had a fifth - of a pancake) and bridge (of which I had none owing to the handiwork of the sandman).

I vaguely remember waking at 3 am and taking a slow and melodramatic walk back to my hotel room, jittering, shivering (with fear and because of the cold). I prayed with every step, it was eerie at the time in the night. Thank God.

Though I walk through the valley of shadow and death, I will not be afraid

Departure (Cya!)
And finally, to sum it up, a visit to the Bangkok airport, where taking Thai airlines meant first priority and everything went smoothly. It was a time for final photograph taking, and Jun Wei was out to capture everyone at least once (Ms Gao proved to be a tough nut - with a newpaper roll in hand, watching and covering at the right moments).

Last minute Duty Free shopping. Daryl picks up a couple of Liquer bottles (Bailey's), Alf picks up a wallet, and that was about it. Thai airlines back. Maggi mee for airplane food - again.

And that brings us back to the first post: where the plane landed and I saw Shaggy :)

and that sums it up. The reflections and all span through all 5 parts :) but to sum it up in a few words:

God has really opened our eyes to the world around us, allowing us to feel His heart for the people and His compassion for those who are in darkness. And having felt this - to have a passion to reach out, love and serve these people, for His glory.

But to feel His heartbeat, we have to draw near, to abide in Him, and to be with Him. The longer we spend in communion with Him, the closer we'll draw to His heart. And so - the call is to "Be Still and know that He is God."

Prayer for the Nation (Part 4)

(Previously, the dedication ceremony came to a close as Tim struggled with a low point of his mission trip stint. What was to come next?)

Slum Visitation
This was simply one of the most meaningful 2 hours of our lives. As Imm's (undoubtedbly one of our favourtie Ajarns) van steered to a halt, we alighted at the doorstep of a KKCS girl's home. There had just been a Buddhist funeral - her grandfather had passed away - and an atmosphere of sorrow hung in the area. With the help of the Ajarns' translation, we struck off a conversation.

The main aim of the slum visitation was to bless - whatever little blessing we could give in that short few hours. We asked for prayer needs, and Mr Charles Ng signaled for me to pray for the family. Thinking back, I couldn't find the words, it was different praying with a translator beside you, and inwardly I asked God to give me the words. We prayed for joy, for the mourning to turn into dancing, for health, and for the saving grace of God. I opened my eyes to see the girl (of 12 or so) welling up in tears. It was inexplainable, and at that point I felt that sorrow, that pain, and prayed that it would go away in God's time.

I wished I had hugged her, but the most I could do was to ask her to cheer up.

We proceeded with many other homes, stopping by students' houses to pray for every single one. Each home had different needs, but the common need was the need for Jesus, and the need for mending of broken hearts. At one home we witnessed the acceptance of Christ by a old woman, at another we prayed for a girl who had lost her ability to walk, and yet at another we prayed for healing of back pain. Simple things like this opened our eyes up to the bigger world, and put a burden in our heart.

We wanted to stay longer. We would have even liked to stay for the night. But time was short. Empitiness, a void within my heart.

Your Love Is Warmer
And that night we rehearsed again for the Christmas concert item (the christmas concert was the next day!!!) - an item that was conceived about a fortnight back. A medley of 'His Love is Warmer' and 'Therefore, Being Justified by Faith', sang in both English and Thai - with actions.

And the actions took a long time to conjure up - I bore much of the humiliation being the first to demonstrate the actions whilst Wes was doing his thing with the guitar. Many laughs on the debut, more on the solo part (which was graciously taken up by Mr Charles Ng and Mr Azmi later - Go OxBridge!). Thai lyrics were a toughie, and we tried to the best of our ability - I guess it's the heart that counts.

And so as one mission team we did the actions together, the singers belting out but slipping now and then to the tongue-twister-lyrics. many smiles, much joy, we hoped the Thai people would know such joy as well.

Christmas Concert
I led worship that morning. Was quite touched by God during that time
Into Your courts we come, Deep in our hearts we long to be near to the throne of Your glory
Hungry I run to You for I know you satisfy
We lift our voices, we lift our hands, we are an offering

Sticky Rice
Yes, preparation for the Christmas concert, we were employed to help with chair arrangements and other tasks. I served in the kitchen :) packing sticky rice into little packets. Boy, was the rice hot, and our (Was there with Desmond, Mr Alvin Tan - a different one, Yang Jian) hands burnt. The Ajarn just smiled at us assuringly :)

Mr Azmi ate 7 Chillis and amused the whole lot of us - faced stuffed with sticky rice, veges and papaya :). Ping Pong (our fellow chilli-plucker), and Ajarn Hanifar were among those left in stitchs :).

Before the Act
No one can forget the fast that happened that afternoon, where we all went on a spiritual high, sang 'Give us clean hands' in desperation, and pleaded with God for salvation. Later on, from Gareth, I found out that this was one of the less prayerful mission trips, in terms of coporate prayer. Perhaps God had different purposes for this mission trip.

Well, we eventually went down to KKCS for the awaited Christmas concert. Before our item, we went about praying in for the concert, and for the peoples' salvation. The chairs were all layed out (yes...tiresomely, by us, that afternoon), and the ground was ready for sowing, we simply prayed that God would move that night.

Of course, we (meaning the guys) were again swarmed for 'tai luk', photo taking. I did get my share of photo requests - haha, how ego-boosting - but God reminded me that He looked at the heart and not at the outward appearance, so I remembered not to be too engrossed in the whole photo-taking issue - though admittingly, it does make one feel happier (happier, not more joyful).

Show Time
So the guitar went off, an improvised spontaneous solo by Wesley. Screams were heard.

Whilst Wes was entertained the cries of his fan club, we went off to singing and dancing. Not surprisingly I was the front man of the dancers, it was nerve-wrecking, but we kept the smiles on our faces, and enjoyed ourselves on stage, danced and sang for God and not for men!

I think I ruined my image. But well. God's glory not mine :)

Shine Jesus Shine
Shine Jesus Shine, Fill this land with the Father's glory!
Wes, Gareth and I sang this as a prayer as Watchman Loh went up to give his testimony and the subsequent altar call. Unshamedbly singing.

Later, the ushers were called up (that included us) to usher (what else?) the people who had responded to the altar call to a room where we would pray for them. I found myself with a guy who reeked of alcohol. He was a Christian, but one with an apparent drinking problem. I tried to ask for prayer needs with the help of Mr Cheong, but in the end, we decided that he was too drunk to be taken seriously.

I did pray for one boy though - Jim-my, or something close to that, was his name. A little boy of Grade 1 or 2, innocently responded to the altar call. He asked that we pray for love, and his family, and that he would feel loved. It was a touching prayer request, I was speechless for a moment as I realised that he had such a simple, innocent yet deep request - one that only God could provide. Well, we prayed, and I do hope God answers.

Reluctance
Summed up in a word, we were reluctant to leave that night. Many more photos, many more goodbyes, many more nostalgic feelings, many more smiles, hugs and tears. I too felt a strange longing to be in that school, a strange passion for that school - looking back, it probably wasn't 'strange', but God-given. I often wonder, when Jesus left earth, did He too feel a strange sense of longing - did He wish He could stay longer beside his disciples. Well, we'll ask Him in heaven.

Of course, because of our deli-dali (if I might use that word), Mr Charles Ng went cranky again. It kind of ruined the night. But not completely, there was still the joy that came from the whole concert :)

Day of Rest
A more relaxed atmosphere the next day. We took time off individually to rest in God and to rest in each others' fellowship. The major events were finally over, and there was even some R&R that day.

But first, the church service at Khon Kaen Church. Fortunately I sat next to a Thai-married-to-a-Singaporean woman who translated graciously for the people sitting around her. The sermon was about material needs versus spiritual needs, a very fundamental principle in Christianity, but one that we should always revise. Songs and greetings were all in Thai, but for the upteen time, there wasn't any language barrier with God :).

Post service I remembered Ping and the sweetest thing she ever did that whole mission trip - gave me a tapioca puff, and I pushed aside all dieting tendencies and ate it. It was so much sweeter simply because it was a gift of love :) awww.

(and that ends this part, the next will probs be the last - hopefully)

Give Thanks (Part 3)

(And we left off on the final lesson of Day 4, things will - hopefully - start to speed up from here, lest my stamina fail me)

The Vips Arrive
And with them came a strange change in atmosphere. They went to the family center to witness the intense derusting and wall washing processes (yes, need I mention that morning was filled with equally intense scrubbing of moss off the walls - most fufilling. This was followed by a white wash and bright green pastel paints - yay), whilst we - at KKCS, remained there and never returned to the family center (I had really wanted to return to bid farewell to the lovely children, but the opportunity never came, but prayer can make up for all distances, fortunately).

And to accompany the change in atmosphere - a most fitting dinner at the 5 star Sofitel hotel, where we gorged ourselves silly with a grand buffet dinner - not short of oysters, caesar's salad, sushi and lots of other 'good stuff'. What a violent contrast to the poverty that the slum people lived in.

There was a certain sense of guilt - why should we be in comfort while others were suffering? Should we not share in their suffering. A moment of epiphany - was this mission trip turning into a mere Christian vacation...? It was a question I could never resolve - but even as I entertained the thoughts, more and more sumptious food slipped into my bottomless belly (a questionable comment - since many consider me anorexic)

And the night went by swiftly.

Oh. The Horrid Cap!
A comment most likely to be made by Wesley. Yes, the next day involved us getting decked into our spanking new Primer uniforms! With Tim Toh, Tim Liang, Russ and LeeYang drooling in envy, we put on our lighter, whiter and less complicated uniforms - with much glee. Upon being asked what we would like to be called (having put on our new uniforms), Wesley responded with a very strange 'Power Rangers'. And so we were rangers for a day!

I tried to avoid the cap, as a rule of thumb, all BB boys try to avoid putting the cap on. For one, it makes one look like a milkmaid, for another, it completely messes up the hairdo. Vanity aside, it is quite irritating :). Wesley couldn't agree more, and so he grimaced as we pushed him to put on the cap. But at the critical moment, I saved him (perhaps it was just pity...hehe). Lee Yang was without a cap, and I suggested that Wesley lend him his cap. As a very caring and self-sacrificial senior (no saracasm intended...), Wesley passed his cap over.

And so while Wes felt the wind through his hair, the rest of us entered the gates of KKCS with abnormal headgear.

Give Thanks With a Grateful Heart
Having been given Christmas cards for each teacher, we proceeded spreading the christmas joy. I found my teacher in the Grade 1 classroom, and went forth with God's confidence and prayed for her, in front of the whole class - who were staring wide-eyed and amazed, probably thinking 'Who is this strange person - with the strange cap?' The rest also got off to their respective teachers.

The dedication ceremony went smoothly, Wes and I looked upon the exhibition boards with much pride - yes the nails were hammered in painstakingly by us (actually, thank God). Well, translation from Thai to English and back again extended the ceremony. And Dr Ong was a little too much - The translator (Ajarn Songsri) was visually having a hard time with those long and endless sentences, peppered with false stops and pauses.

It was a meaningful time. The choir sang beautifully, and the presence of God was truly ushered into the place. As the choir sang, the breeze grew in strength, and we were ministered to by the wind, through the gentle whispering wind. Beautiful. They sang 'Give thanks' in Thai, but language was again no barrier where there was God.

And the message was fitting - build buildings to build up people! Building up people is one of God's main purposes - to change people into Christ's likeness! If a building does not serve it's purpose, it will collapse when the time of judgement comes.

The service ended with a crazy photo taking session. Wesley, again, being the main target. Admittedly, I did look on with disappointment, and the devil discouraged me with such sadness. It was strange that I wanted the attention, that I wanted to be welcome, and couldn't find it. Yet God told me to 'Flee from the evil desires of youth'. I sought photos, found none, and found God's assurance. It was a low-point for me, but a high point following God's assurance. Thank God that He kept me from envy and jealously.

Thank God...Give thanks

(will be continued...note the word 'will')

Christmas in Thailand (Part 2)

(this might just be the only part 2 I've ever composed...but well...experiences are tough to forget)

More Teaching, Painting, and (oh noes) Derusting
Mr Charles Ng returned to normal the next day, overjoyed, the Sec 4s had yet another rendezvous (oh the love I have for that word) and gave thanks to God. Yes, he returned to the usual bubbly personality, and the occasional greeting of 'How are you (insert name here).

Again, I was one of those who stayed behind for teaching. Well, (un)fortunately there wasn't teaching to be done that day, we were tasked with creating some exhibition boards for a dedication ceremony in two days. It was an exhibition for reflection and remembrance - some thirty photos were to be displayed - a reminder of God's work in Thailand for the past 10 years.

The girls proceeded to the designs and frilly things - John was at teaching, Wesley and I effectively excommunicated. The gender distinction was clear, and we proceeded with the tough 'male' things - this included procuring (yes in Mr Charles' language) the three wooden boards, shifting them down from the third to second story (I assure you it was difficult); Also, we had to find and hammer nails into the top two corners of each board. That was the fun part.

Hammers and Nails - Caveman style
There were no nails in sight, no hammers in sight, just debris. Fortunately, God created 'innovative spirit' in men, and Wesley obtained a makeshift hammer - a brick - and he beamed as he held it up in his hand. I just gave him the 'ok...' look.

We found used nails, stuck in other strange blocks of wood. And with much determination, strength, and sheer grace of God, proceeded to extract them as a dentist does with teeth, except with our bare hands. It was painful, Wes was dripping (with perspiration), I was just tired. But we managed to get the nails nevertheless, and pounded them in with the 'hammer'.

We did get a real hammer later, the boys from KKCS were so helpful! Thank you! But I guess it was fun remembering how tough it was without one.

Soybean milk and mentos
One comment I could never shrug off myself was Wesley mentioning the estrogen content of soybean milk - of course at the most apt moment: when I was about to take a sip. Myth or fact? You decide. Of course, when one mentions that mentos can cause impotency, then one's credibility becomes extremely questionable. How can innocent harmless little sweets, the joy of so many children cause such a disaster? well, I drank and ate merrily anyway :)

Family Center Joy
Well, we left the girls to their fancy business - Fui, Jess and Ms Gao would have little problems - and proceeded to the family center for more painting and derusting. I had the honor of derusting next to Daryl, who boasted extendedly about his 30cm by 60com frame that was 'beautifully derusted'. Of course, it took him half a day, and there were about 50 similar frames :) Eva was most pleased, at least it brought comic relief.

Did I mention singing with Mr Charles Ng and Eva and the rest of the gang who stood in a straight line derusting? We sang to the rhythm of derusting, sang of the searing sun that bore down upon us, and sang many praises to God. Well that passed the time :D.

Painting on the front fence begun. We took half a day to paint half a fence. Great, we rejoiced, only to hear from afar, the sound of a spray paint gun - which subsequently took 20 minutes to achieve the same (apparent) feat. We exchanged blank looks. well.

Lee Yang and Daryl and the Dog
We decided to go for a walk in the slum area. Well there wasn't much to see, except the poor state in which the people lived. Compassion welled up where empathy was impossible. We moved on, praying as we went. In all honesty - even compassion was difficult to feel, perhaps our hearts had been hardened by our privileged lives. but at that moment, I prayed that I could look at the people through eyes of Jesus, and feel for them. And love them. I prayed and faithfully waited.

We met a little black puppy later on. Daryl was most excited by the puppy - fondling it, carrying it, teasing it, and mentioning it's striking resemblance of Lee Yang.

Catching and Magic Tricks
We returned to find the slum children running riot throughout the whole family center - the natural response was simply to join them in their little fun. We all did in our own ways. Mr Charles Ng entertained with his umbrella, the children doing a merry go round with it, later, he proceeded to perform a 'leaf-disappearing' magic trick, that almost left his pants pulled down (much to his surprise - yes the children wanted to search him for the missing leaf). The children were intelligent enough to see through his trickery :)

Me? I went for good-old catching. The thai boy 'Moi' ran and ran and hid and hid. John and I chased, and (well) intentionally failed. But it was fun, and it was so rewarding to see the smiles on their faces, and to see that love was conveyed through that little session of play-time. The joy of the Lord was present, and we all felt it - all through that whole night :) full of praises. wow.

The Desperate Fast
Fasting is all about mourning - mourning for a bridegroom, that is Jesus, who has left the earth and will return again, mourning for the city of Khon Kaen. That night was declared a fast, and we prayed that God would prepare our hearts. Prayer was all about desperation, were we desperate enough, and were we close enough to God's heart? Would our prayers be heard and answered?

I remember entering the prayer room to crying. Tears of joy and tears of weeping, both intermingling with each other. It took sometime to settle into the presence of God, but that night was about being still, and being close to God. I felt prompted to Isaiah 9 :

6 For to us a child is born,
to us a son is given;
and the government shall be upon his shoulder,
and his name shall be called
Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God,
Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.

It was a verse of hope, I felt, for Khon Kaen, God would remember Khon Kaen, it was just a matter of time. Also, it was a reminder of that true meaning of Christmas, which drew ever so near...

That night was also the affirmation of my brother (in Christ) Mr Jonas Chow, who was called to full-time ministry. As he wept we prayed prayers of comfort and of hope, and that night marked a night of silence before God. Intercession required desperation, and many of us searched our hearts for intercession that night, seeking and seeking. We had a time where we asked God for our convictions once again, and affirmed them before Him.

Feed my lambs

Bye Eva and SweeKim!
The GB duo left us the next morning...it was a little saddening as I recalled it, they had been bottles of joy. Eva was most sweet with her alto harmonies had her eccentric laughter - she was also my angel (yes...never complete without angel and mortal...:P), and truly I was grateful for all those lovely messages that came my way. Miss ya sista!

We waved goodbye as they purchased tickets for the busride to Bangkok (actually, we wished them a pleasant sleep on the bus...they needed all of God's grace to pull through..haha)

Final Lesson - Awwww
It was meant to be a lesson observation, but somehow Dr Ong was unable to make it for our lesson, perhaps it was a better thing. Well, essentially, this lesson was similar to the previous one, except we knew them just a little better than previously - and we were teaching different letters.
We ended off with a little ball-rolling game - roll a ball to hit a letter placard and then pronounce the letter - yep simple as that, and you get a sweet as well :) It was a little disappointing that many couldn't get it, but the girls were the beacon of hope - acing it every single time they went up. Wes and Jes' students were able to pronounce whole words (like motorcyle and leaf), ours couldn't even get the letters...well, they did have more girls!! haha.

Distributing sweets is not something you want to do in Thailand, they rush, it's a mad rush, worst than Singaporeans rushing at free stuff. Well that was quite an unforgettable experience, I do hope they shared the sweets in a gentlemanly and ladylike fashion - though I think not :P. It really showed how much they appreciated the little things in life, and how much need they lived in - treasuring every single sweet. makes you wonder - how we waste things - it really is terrible.

And I shall end on this note - to be continued in 2 days :D I promise

Clean Hands and Pure Hearts

And so, Tim has returned. 9 days in Thailand and I'm finally back - a changed person definitely, with many new memories (oh, what an oxymoron) imprinted on the palette of my mind. The various colors of Khon Kaen swishing and swashing about, painting a bright picture - a picture of new passion and hope. Vivid memories ensue, as I unpacked my baggage at home, and thankfully, I brought a piece of Khon Kaen home with me.

On the 10th of December, I composed an email to Ding, a portion in it mentioning that (in a great coincidence) I would be off to Thailand and returning on the 19th. I never got the reply email, but saw him earnestly and faithfully waiting for me at the arrival gate on the last day - albeit a little larger (the American air, we believe) and with hair plastered down in a (contrary to Ding) messy fashion. It seemed an ironic twist of events (Had I said previously that I would wait for him at the airport on the 19th?). It was a great joy to see him there, still ding at the heart. :)

but enough. I'm jumping way ahead of the story. No one reads a book from the back to front, and so I shall follow that social standard of normalcy.

Travel Troubles
On the 10th, we departed, arriving at (insert long Thai name here) Bangkok airport. A short 3 hour flight, in great contrast with the 6 hour bus ride that greeted us at the airport. Squashed within an unthinkable (here I mean tiny) amount of leg room, with my bag, and Mr Chow's guitar upon my lap, I proceeded to getting some shut-eye. It was tough - given the bumpy road, the little room, and the gradual numbing of my pin-and-needles legs - but eventually, fatigue gave in as the clock approached 4 in the morning. I slept. But only a little. Rather, it was a semi-state of sleep.

Resting in God - Being Still
Arriving on the 11th with little sleep, and a whole day of activity ahead of us was not the best way to start. But we were graciously granted some time for rest, and rest in God (Yes, there must be a clear distinction here). One hour of quiet time a day was the given standard, it was difficult, but as Mr Charles Ng mentioned, it was only the ones who treasured this quiet time with God that would experience God and grow in this mission trip.

Spiritually, God chose to speak quietly this trip. And we found Him preferring a still small voice (don't we always find Him that way?) in place of anything radical.

Psalms 46: 'Be still and know that I am God. I will be exalted in all the earth'

Such powerful words from our Lord. God longs for us to acknowledge Him as God - this includes surrendering our whole being to Him, realising that He is everything and we are nothing (sigh...the essence of humility). Being still, beholding His presence, understanding His silence and His love. More importantly, to know that He is God. It is something great to be grasped. Something powerful. and something which I have yet to fully understand.

First Contact
We visited the school for the first time (at least it was the first time for me). Met the very warm Ajarn Songsri - the principal of Khon Kaen Christian School (KKCS for short). The building was painted in (royal?) purple and yellow - the 2 year old paint starting to peel at parts, but more of less achieving its purpose of brightening up the old school building. The new school building still in progress, 3 stories high but lacking a roof - the current roof being a rough framework (interestingly, one individual felt a close resemblance to suntec city). Other areas of the school was painted in red, blue and yellow strips, a rather good effort at bringing out the ACSian colors, but many felt it made the school look like a temple. Nevertheless, the outside rarely matters more that what is within.

KKCS is a school for students from Nursery to Secondary 3 (otherwise known as Grade 9). Unfortunately (or fortunately), the students were not present on that day - owing to the fact that it was a public holiday. We sat around and did little, visiting the rooftop - where Mr Charles Ng spoke about the importance of replanting the gospel into our hearts, of rethinking the wretched state of man, the infinte justice of God, and the infinite mercy of God (mercy triumphing over justice). Justin also shared his inspiring visit to heaven and quiet conversation with Jesus. How touching to gaze upon Khon Kaen from three stories above.

We were greeted by the various teachers (or Ajarns), and were received with a sumptious meal (it was lunchtime). The warmth and hospitality was something to remember. The language barrier being overcome by acts of love, and of course - our substandard Thai (or whatever little we knew in Thai). It felt a little uncomfortable, but still, love prevailed. Not to mention, I was starting to feel overfed, as serving after serving of rice came. Later I learnt the secret was to say Pom imm leow khrap - 'I am full'. Yes. Most important phrase in Thailand (Arguably, the most important phrase could also be Hong nam yu tee nai khrap? - 'Where is the toilet?' - yes Wesley)

Prayer Walk
Then came the prayer walk. A whole new concept to me. But we were referred to the Israelite's conquering of Jericho, where they marched around the city and praised God for seven days before the walls fell down. As such, during the prayer walk, it was important that we prayed to bless, and prayed to glorify and praise God, staying spiritually sensitive to things around us, praying when we felt the need to. Also, it was a prayer to break down barriers, and open the hearts of men.

We were led to several places, and I still recall vividly, how we were led.

The Canteen ('Feed my Lambs') - here it was a prayer for the sustenance of the students and the teachers. Also a short prayer for students to be free from any baggage or bondages from the past (inspired by the presence of ropes). There was a nagging need felt in the canteen, though we could not pin it down.

Grade 8 Classroom - Daryl felt led here. A prayer for the students that they will be brought up with the right moral values (Fui mentioned that many girls nowadays determine their value by the number of boys who liked them), with Christian values. Lee Yang was led to Daniel 5 - the judgement of Belshazzar - the desecration of God's temple. That was a scary prospect, we brought it up later at the debrief. Lee Yang's image of tangled string.

School Field - A half-barren field. We prayed for growth of the school, for discipleship, and felt that though elements for growth (sunshine, water and soil) were present, there was something that was missing. The sprinklers led Daryl to picture a river of life that could once again restore growth in the land.

At a later debrief, the various groups gave a summary of that things that were felt during the prayer walk. Fear ensued for a moment - there were feelings of judgement, Haggai 1 came to my mind, and there was the worrying passage from Daniel 5. However, after much prayer, it was felt that God's presence still dwelled in the school, and God's favor was very much upon the school. We were told to focus on the love and compassion of God on the children of the school and not focus overly on judgement. That was what I chose to do, though the talk of judgement was strangely worrying, and not something to be dismissed so simply.

Cranky (Mr) Charles
And it was such possibilities, coupled with the stress of being team leader, and having to make everything tick according to schedule that caused the usually jovial Mr Charles Ng to turn cranky. Other than the occasional winks of the eye, he was painfully silent, and sometimes chose to (oddly) ignore us when we spoke to him. Crankiness. The Sec 4s all felt it. And we knew we had to pray. But that, I will come back to later.

Turning Point
That night, my life was changed. In a brief moment we were told that only 3 more boys could go and teach the next day, and the rest would have to go the the family center to do painting. Priority was given to the NYAA boys - the Sec 4s. We were shocked - what justified the priority? Surely not a mere NYAA award. For a moment we were lost. There were five Sec 4 boys, two would have to be left behind. No one wanted to raise his hand, for fear of disappointing the rest.

But Kenneth raised his hand. And I followed, upon remember the words that God had spoken to me a feel days back 'Feed my lambs'. I felt called, and that was it, i made the decision. It seemed selfish, but I decided to pray over it. The last person to volunteer was John. In retrospect, it was a painful choice, seeing the many Year 5s who wanted to go and meet up with their former students in the school (Gareth and Justin mainly). Painful. But it changed my life.

百年树人: Teaching
We were off to teaching in KKCS the next day. Mr Kan gave a briefing, we prepared the materials. Of course there was a rather humorous encounter between Mr Kan and Ms Gao as some of us would remember. Ms Gao preferred rest to teaching - in the end, Mr Kan, gentlemanly as he was, relented. I was given the daunting task of teaching a class of 17, thankfully Fui would be there to help me. Wes (Kenneth gave up his place) and Jes, John and Mr Kan would also be teaching a group of students.

As we entered the school, the students greeted us warmly. Perhaps a little too warmly. To quote Mr Jonathan Ng, we were like Hollywood stars. If that were so, Wesley would have been the main star, he was swarmed by the Grade 7 to 9 girls. Sounds of 'Sawatdii ka' (the thai greeting), 'Khun chi arai ka?' (what is your name?) rung in the air. And how about me? I stayed in the background, little attention. Perhaps it was my looks, perhaps it was just the presence of Wesley. There wasn't jealously, but there was a tinge of disappointment. I shrugged it aside though, and focused on what was ahead.

Camping in Mr Evan Yap's little room, Ms Gao gave us a crash course on teaching, and we had several practice runs, and drew little pictures on our whiteboards. Learnt a little more thai. Otherwise, we simply rested ourselves for the task to come.

The lessons focused on phonetics, the KKCS students recognized letters, but they were unsure of the sounds. And so our lessons were filled with:

'K. K sounds like (siang men) Ke. Ke. Ke."
'L. L sounds like (siang men) Le. Le. Le."
'Khao jai mai khrap?' (Do you understand?)
*insert blank look*

And every few moments:
'Nong long! Nong long khrap!' (desperate cry for children to sit down and pay attention)

I think I lost my voice after the lesson. Controlling a bunch of hyperactive thai students was no piece of cake - not to mention we had the majority of boys (yes boys were harder to control, and girls were stereotypically smart - sorry to say guys). And when we produced sweets to reward them, upon seeing the sweets in our hands, even the girls went wild, we were swarmed, and hopelessly lost control.

And before I make the lesson sound like a tragedy, it was acutally really fun, and really rewarding, the students were really cute at times (no. I'm no pedophile...please). We hoped to build up simple relationships with them - relationships that would be built up in the years to come.

Short term mission trips with a long commitment.

We left for the family center thereafter.

Fe2O3 - Derusting Family Center
Auntie Dorothy - whose late husband Gerald Khoo founded the Gerald Khoo Foundation, was part of the team who pioneered a family center in the midst of the slum area. Using a millionaire's former mansion (obviously, the mansion in the middle of the slum was not prime property, so they got their hands on it), they created a family center for people of the slum to go to for aid - or simply for company and some joy.

We were tasked to paint the family center and make a it little more jolly. Unfortuanately, painting was not the only thing on the agenda, we also had to de-rust. Oh that horrid word - Derusting!! A gate went around the whole mansion, a gate that bore the many scars of time, and we first had to use sandpaper to smoothen the rusted surfaces before paint could be applied. That alone was a draining task. And though we tried to do it with a joyful heart, it was difficult, given the sheer size of the job.

Donning straw hats, we proceeded with derusting. Gloves were stained brown, shirts were splattered with green paint (thankfully, we started to paint the front gate) and peppered with rusty bits of metal. Dirty job, but someone had to do it. And we did it with the slum people in mind, hopefully they will be blessed through the bright new colors of the family center.

The family center - a beacon of joy in the slum area, a refuge for the lost, and a ministry of love that will hopefully help to spread the message of salvation as well. It was all worthwhile.

We left with the job unfinished - but it didn't matter - we would come back for another 2 days to finish the job.

Pregnant Python
We returned to KKCS - this time with the whole group - to a welcome ceremony organized by the school. Again, we met up with the teachers, and tried to strike up conversations with them. Fortunately, a not-so-bad translator sat at our table - one of the Ajarns - and so we proceeded to learn more Thai words (like chopstick, and song, and others...)

Coloured cloths (pardon me I forgot the Thai name) that were characteristic of the Isaan (NE) regoin of Thailand were tied around our waists (was it to accentuate the bulk of it?) to welcome us. The cloth would become my very good friend - my trusty scarf - for the rest of the trip :), as most of the mission trip team would fondly remember.

We ate pregnant python (sausages actually - but Watchman Loh decided to call it something more exotic), beef noodles, and were further welcomed by the coconut dances and the song performances.

And then in quite rude a fashion, some of us left for networking - that is meeting up with the community of people in Khon Kaen who were all working for the same purpose in Khon Kaen - thereby expanding the network of people striving for the common purpose in Khon Kaen.

Networking
Fun ride to YWAM, I must confess. We sat at the back of a jeep-like vehicle, unsheltered and travelling at a rather high speed on the highway. Fui describing it as how the construction workers would feel - as our hair battered our freezing faces - the wind swiftly blowing.

It was a Thai service at YWAM. Thai preaching and Thai songs. We arrived late for the service, in fact, it was already the conclusion - albeit a rather long conclusion. As I recall - the Thai version of 'The Power of Your Love' was sung, and though there was (again) a language barrier, God's presence had no barrier, and everyone felt His strong commanding presence during the session, as we sung our hearts out and worshipped Him.

Sec 4 Rendezvous
Returning to the hotel, we had the daily session of worship and word, after which the Sec 4s met up for a little chat, and voiced our feelings for the past few days. A rather light chat, but many issues were brought up. And we prayed for Mr Charles Ng to be back to normal, talked about the painful selection of who would teach on the first night, and shared our experiences for the day.

Wesley shared how on the first night, he had been disappointed not to teach, as he had not raised his hand. He was confused and so prayed that if God wanted him to teach, God would offer him a miracle. At the same time, Kenneth shared that he was praying on the first night, only to find that he was not fit for the job (owing to lack of patience - among reasons), and so the next day he decided to give up his place - to wesley. The prayers were answered, what a miracle.

And so why did Kenneth put up his hand that night, well, one of the purposes - was that it led to me plucking up the courage to raise mine, otherwise the opportunity to teach might have been opened to the entire floor, and snapped up quickly by the rest. God was working - no doubt.

That concluded the second day. I vaguely remember falling asleep owing to fatigue.

And that concludes this post. Will continue this another time. Too many blessings, too little time to post.

Pre Khon Kaen Reflections: Training (Part 1)

And so. Now we reflect on the past week, a hectic week, a week of irony. Resting in God, being refreshed spiritually, but physically, we've been really tired. Of course, much to Mr Charles Ng's delight, the midnight and afternoon tea sessions have served their perking-up purposes :). And yes, I am a tea-lover, not really one for coffee :)

Mission trip training has truly been a delight. Fellowship with God has really been brought to a new level. Really, in all this tiring training, I've sought to rekindle that flame with Him, and to rediscover the reason of serving Him, to find meaning in this which I am doing. Asking God for His presence, and for His assuring word - I've realised, that ultimately, through all this seeking, God hopes only to bring us closer to Him. It's the giver, not the gift, that matters (remember that this Christmas!)

Convictions. Perhaps something that I wasn't sure of at the beginning. Was it my desire to go to Thailand? Or God's desire. I prayed the prayer of Isaiah "Here I am, Send me", and waited. That was months back. But having been strongly encouraged by the people around me, I felt that perhaps God was speaking to me through circumstance, and not only circumstance, but that burden for children, that love for children, and those in need. The greatest call for a Christian is to love those around him.

And another time, the Lord assured me of His protection. It was in psalms. 'the Lord is our fortress'. It happened twice, the same line appearing again when I asked for a second conviction and assurance. And I felt peace in my heart after that.

Today, Mr Ng asked us again to ask for a word. And as I reflected and thought, though it was a short time into the prayer, it was the clearest I felt, the Lord ever spoke. It was strange. I thought of how one of the prophets felt God through the gentle wind, and felt His comforting presence. And at that very moment, the words appeared in my head.

Feed My Lambs.

It was strange and sudden. And I said 'Yes', quite immediately, with little thought (in restrospect), it was a great commitment, this 'yes'. And I do hope the Lord sees me through. As such, the command is to love, and to love those in the team, as well as those we are about to meet. Reading on in 2 timothy. There was a message from Paul to Timothy to 'Flee the evil desires of youth and pursue righteousness, faith, love and purity.' And not to 'quarrel'

Yes the devil will be there. But Jesus has won the battle! We will strive to be united, and repentant, and loving, only with God's presence and His aid! Hallelujah! Set us aflame Lord! and guide us in this trip with everlasting arms! Amen.

Pre Khon Kaen Reflections: Church Camp (Part 1)

Well. It's been a long week. I guess this blog will no longer be a public one, probably one of those 'for my eyes only' blogs. Recalling some time ago - I had a post about the lifespan of a blog - Looking back, I've probably reached the end of the road. Still, the blog will go on, albeit less frequently updated, but with more thought put in for every post. Admittingdly, just by reading blog posts, one can see that one has grown and matured over the years, thank God.

Church camp was from December 4th to 6th, leaving my SK account in Fab's hands, and coming back to find it dead was the most pleasant surprise. But trivial issues aside, the church camp was really a camp to remember.

Most unforgettable was the new company, fresh fellowship in the form of the X-Change youths. Refreshing to see a bunch of new faces, and i'll never forget their company, despite the language and cultural differences. For 3 days I found myself conversing in the classic Singlish-cum-Chinese-cum-English language, immersing myself in a different culture. I had missed MCYC, but this was probably the equilavent. Differences aside, we had a lot in common, and built meaningful relationships throughout the camp.

X-Change Program Youths: Baby-faced-"cute"-Hosea, Contagious-laughter cum Symphony Yi Tuck, Sleepyhead Nicol, Scapegoat Amos, Amiable Sean, Grumpy-but-cheered-up-later Lawrence, Hyperactive Vimal, New-boy-David (and goliath)

Not forgetting the p5 youths who were colorful and special in their own not-so-quiet way. Justin in his air of mystery (perhaps a polite euphemism of 'quiet') and occasional smiles of satisfaction. And screw-loose-hermit-crab-crazy Naomi adding much spice to the bus trips and dormitory interactions.

Of course there were the older ones - most notably the three musketeers hwee, ah jun jie (huijun) and I, who (tried) to facilitate the camp. And yes I was the camp commander, funnily enough. My brother, Tianli, Rinnah, Daniel were also present for the camp.

Can't help but name all the peeps who came! Thanks to Doris, Wilson, See Kar, Jack, May Lan, Kok Hong and Michael! you guys were great in helping us out....!! Michael...thanks for the laughs and the shamelessness :D

And so the camp went great, with God's abudant blessing. The tunnel was a dark as ever, the impact was deep, the ladder held up. The rolling contest was most exciting, except that many scraped away narrowly. Of course we had a ridiculous time seeing who could endure the longest placing their hands on the van, just to win the right to a comfortable ride in the air-conditioned vehicle.

Kok Hong's blindfold-bean lesson was greatly provoking and touching as well.

2 hour Hide and seek is ridiculously long (and need I mention...fun?)

Pulau Ubin. The skies were clear. The tides came at the right times! Enough said, we had a blast, and God was the master behind it!

Of course, we incurred the wrath of the GB authorities (yes we were at GB campsite). Water bombs, midnight ruckus, and various other crimes earned us the a ban from the campsite. Oh well...fairfield...you now have been black-listed...

Well. God was the person we liked to thank most! our wonderful counsellor! and great sovereign king! Thanks Lord for all the sunshine, all the fellowship, and for YOU!!

What If?

Funny how we love to think back on life, and question the possible paths we might have taken, to ponder and let the imagination entertain itself with thoughts of how things might have been - thoughts of fantasy. Oh! What joy the mind finds in fantasy! Fantasy - where anything is possible, where nothing is impossible, where there are endless boundaries! And sometimes I do find myself in such a 'What if' mood as well.

I often wonder, and ponder, especially after every annual band concert, the possibility of myself joining the band in Sec 1, had it not been for the Boys' Brigade. A little far-fetched, but entirely possible - musical passion would have definitely drove me to join. And had that happened, of all instruments, I would pick the clarinet to play. The clarinet, mellow, not too heavy, woodwind, elegance, sigh. Such thoughts (of fantasy) are what occupy the mind, whenever I witness any band before me.

And yet I know for sure, it wouldn't have happened, God had other plans, higher and greater plans, and other ways of utilizing that passion for music. Having been led by God, here I am in the BB, and well enjoying it, and learning so much from it.

Surely God knew best, but still there remains a lingering desire in the soul, fufilled (or partially so) by spells of fantasizing - sadly. And reality will always be at opposites with one's desires (or most of the time). I was mesmerized today, and will continue to be in the years to come. Perhaps, the music wasn't the best, but the fact that it struck a chord with the heart was what mattered, and that made the difference.

Maybe one day...someday, the dreams will come true. But till then, we'll keep on living, joyfully, the life the God has given us. one can't do everything, and there is a place and purpose for every individual, accepting our place, and fufilling all the God has planned, would probably be the best way to live life :)

Have U Bin to Ubin?

It was an adventure unlike any other. Across the waters on a rickety bumboat and arriving at Pulau Ubin in the late afternoon, the tide inching its way up the shore, aided by the pouring rains and threatening thunderclouds. We had prayed hard for pleasant weather for the 'recce' session, but perhaps someone prayed harder (or better put, there was a greater need elsewhere). Either way, we made our way down to a (quite unsightly) shed stacked with bicycles, the main form of transport on the island which apparently portrayed a 1960s Singapore.

Drenched by that point in time we took off on $5 mountain bikes (which looked a little dodgy, but held out, fortunately).

sigh gtg...be back later.

The Cho

Recall the cho across which Dr Khanna's father took his last steps, the searing desert heat, and unbearable pain burning through your feet. Tying leaves to his feet, only to find the leaves completely permeable to the heat. Perhaps a fictitious place, but one which our school's Astro Turf is modelled upon. For today I tasted the the full blast of the heated turf.

Perhaps it was sheer madness that caused me not to have second thoughts about wearing sandals to school, it was entirely possible for me to return home and fetch a pair of shoes, given that I had only realised my folly about two steps out of the Condominium estate. Still, I persisted, choosing to put faith in my not-so-tough-as-steel feet, only to find regret.

To be fair, the ground only threatened at the beginning, hardly a tingle, but prolonged exposure was - in a word - hell. In a moment it became clear that I would not last, even as I struggled to hentak-kaki to beat the heat. Half an hour into the game and I sat out, because it was far too hot. I had hoped for the sun to go down, but apparently it wouldn't relent, not today.

But there was purpose in all this I guess. For in my sitting I struck up a conversation with David, on of those in charge of the MCYC youths - who, coincidentally came for a meet-the-BB-Boys' (with a captial B as always) session - and it was in this conversation that we exchanged thoughts on the workings and building of a Preaching Point, during which of course I shared the interesting experiences of worshipping in a Cathay Cinema Hall.

And that would bring us to MCYC, the camp which has both been a blessing and (sometimes, unfortunately) a burden - still, I'd prefer to see it as a blessing. As the youths came and went, mixing with us in the process, we felt joy, we felt fulfilment, and we also felt that we had a long way to go. Breaking down age, education and (yes) gender barriers was no picnic, and we would have our hands full for the coming two weeks. Still I debate over the possibility of attending the camp, to go or not to go, though the latter seems more likely - given a very packed schedule.

Recently, I've been trying to finish a book that was (graciously) lent to me by Derek - The Moor's Last Sigh by Salman Rushdie (the poor potato). A satisfying read so far, but difficult to understand in its own ways. An exploration into a dysfunctional family, revelations of human nature, the very best and the very worst, struggles within relationships, passion, desire, abstinence, rejection, ecstasy, all the different flavors of life, tantalizing spices of life, dashed onto a platter, a generous portion indeed.

And now, it seems, this blog remains as but a fragment of what it was. Merely a record of life now, unvisited (though many come and go silently). Let it be that way. To my invisible audience, adieu!

Satan's Folly (For those in temptation)

Thanks to Max Lucado for this, a truly inspirational chapter that i felt urged to share.

We've all seen the hilarious scene before. A first-time soccer player on the field, by some fluke of a chance steals the ball away from the opposing team, dribbles with ease past two or so defenders, unleashes a 'killer shot', whips it into the goal. He does his celebration, all sorts, we'll leave that to your imagination, only to find in a moment, that rejoicing alongside him, are players from the opposite team. Own Goal. The embarassment, the shame, and the sheer folly of it all. It's disappointing, we all know that, to score an own goal.

Take a moment to think about this. Satan scores own goals all the time. How so you might ask? Think about it, all temptations result in folly for Satan. It's true. Let's think about this.

Say you get tempted. If you resist, that is Satan's folly, it builds you up in strength against him. But that's a straight-forward one. What if we fall for it? What if we fail to hold up against temptation - well I'm sure some of you (if not most) already have the answer in mind.

From past experience, I can safely say, that temptations and sin build you up. If it wasn't for my struggle in the past and that tussle in the past, I wouldn't know the depth of God's grace, the breath of His loving arms, and the great extent of mercy that He offers us everyday. If it wasn't for falling into the darkness, we wouldn't appreciate the light, and wouldn't see anything in that light. But it is precisely because we fall, and are picked up by God again, that we can grow closer in fellowship with Him.

Max also states this: that Satan is under the control of God. Satan is God's servant. Recall that Satan had to gain God's permission before he could tempt and afflict Job. Recall also that God will not let us be tempted beyond what we can bear (1 Cor 10:13), and remember that everything was created for the glory of God - including Satan. As such, Satan is indeed evil, but it backfires ultimately, every time, and it only helps to build up the kingdom of God. Numerous examples in the bible - Daniel in the Lion's Den, Balaam's cursing of Israel, you name it.

Well isn't that why God allowed there to be evil in this world in the first place. He could have just intervened, but He didn't.

And with this in mind - knowing that temptations will only help us to grow in our faith, struggles will help us to grow closer to God - we can then face every temptation with more strength and confidence!

hope that's an encouragement to those out there...especially those tussling with temptation!

What to Say?

and this blog is likely to be seen as dead. and i pretty much agree.

holidays are no fun i guess. it gets boring with nothing much to do at home.

I see people play their lives away on the computer, sleep their lives away on bed.

I'm no better I guess. But I do hope that God will make this a meaningful holiday.

Recently, been reading lots of Christian literature. Max Lucado's books to be precise. Really touching, really encouraging. And one day I'll share a little joy to encourage you all as well.
Playing the Piano has also become a regular part of the day. FF's Memories of Life, and well just my own nonsense again, and yes BEEThoven (the vegetable no?). I'm getting cranky.

alrighty. that's it then. it remains to be seen, what be the fate of this blog.

Forgotten Holidays

And a few years back, the holidays would kick off with some sleepover, as I remember it, at Ken Wei's place. Nights filled with ineffable laughter and joy, chatting, rolling people up in mattresses (the 'sushi treatment' as we called it), the occasional gaming, indulging in comics, late nights, and just unforgettable company. Folks like Darren, Sean, my brother, the hippo Fippo, would join in, and we'd have a blast.

It's something that I would recall with a certain sense of fondness, yet loss. So near but yet so far perhaps. Missing that carefree spirit, that no-holds-barred play hard attitude. Missing the holidays that weren't packed with so many commitments. Useless living, but it brought laughter and refreshment to the parched soul. And yet I recall Kenny's (or rather the Friar's) advice that 'the sweetest honey is loathesome in its own deliciousness', perhaps that is true too, but I seem to still prefer an overdose of honey to none at all.

Years back there would be that sense of anticipation to some mega trip overseas with family, with my beloved cousins, to Perth, Brisbane, Melbourne (we loved Australia) or California. Something similar. But this year, it's to Thailand for mission trip, and in a fated clash of events, my dad announed that he would only be free for the period where I will be in Thailand. Not that it's a painful thing to be serving God, it's just that it would be a different sort of anticipation. Or perhaps I'm still confused in all this inebriated nostalgia.

Years back I would recount such events with a great use of intermittent elipses, but I guess I've knocked off that habit, much to the relieve of many of my friends, and the blog has become more user-friendly (or rather, reader-friendly) as a result. But somehow, the raw beauty such unrefined typing is something that I sorely miss as well.

As I packed my room this year (a rather trendy thing to be doing now), I found many items from the past, letters from people I miss dearly (sigh. church camp), encouraging birthday messages, letters of thanks ranging from 'Thanks for playing the piano in church!' to 'Thanks for being our page-boy!'. Letters that will fade away with time. There's something about nostalgia that hurts, yet it hurts us in such a striking way that we will only long for more. Strange but true. I suppose this is the 'bog of reminiscence'.

And so this year's holiday, a world of difference. Hopes of reuniting with classmates the next year dashed, replaced by the (fearful?) anticipation of the new IB year. No sleepovers, lest there be some miraculous connection (or rather, reconnection). No holidays (but perhaps I should shift my perspective - this mission trip could be seen as a holiday of resting in our Father). No useless days of doing nothing, more work, more NYAA, more tutoring of Mdm Loo's daughter, more commitments.

In the face of everything, well, I do feel a little upset. But i guess, it's a different sort of holiday, a holiday with a difference, perhaps a meaningful holiday would bring more joy than a useless one, as long as the Lord blesses it. And that is my prayer, that somehow peace, joy, and even rest, may come out of this otherwise hectic holiday. And I pray that for everyone else as well. :)

Ode To Eric

While everyone's in a mood for reminiscence, i guess i should spend a moment reflecting on the loss as well, I'm no poet, that's no secret, I'll stick with unrefined nostalgia.

We all agree, we'll miss eric, for his antics, for his guitar playing, for who he was, and for all those laughs that he brought to our faces. For that passion (and fiasco) in the 2005 4.9 CASL worship band plan (which fell through), for all those practices that led to the playing for worship in front of the school last August. For Sally, that little bunny, that showed that perhaps Eric shared with some of us that fondness for stuffed toys (I for one kept a torn and tattered stuffed toy dog till I lost her last year *sobs*)

Sadly, I couldn't bid farewell to Eric like I did with Ding. Church beckoned, and I was needed to play those hymns and that doxology. It felt quite painful, after all we wanted to give Eric a meaningful and heartfelt goodbye, and I couldn't be there to give it. Nevertheless, I gave my blessing the previous night, and prayed that he would have a great time in America.

Still, let's keep Eric, our dear Christian brother, for all his angst, in prayer. Let's keep in touch with him, and let's look forward to his return (hint hint next year). God Bless, Eric. This is not our final farewell :) - yes Tim always has to end on an optimistic note haha.

The Week Goes By

And in a flash, one week passes us by, and it has no doubt been an eventful week, contrasting moments of euphoria and sadness. Birthdays and departures. Somehow, time just seems more and more fleeting with the passing of time. And the importance of needing to get close with God just seems to get stronger and stronger with each passing moment.

Bye Eric. Happy Birthday Sean. Mixed emotions. Church cost me a farewell to Eric, but let's keep in contact with that bubbly friend of ours, emails emails and more emails.

Chinese A2 was introduced to me about a week ago, by Mdm Loo. Something like courage drove me to be gungho and decide to take the subject next year, or perhaps it was pure human foolishness. Interest over academic marks, like I've always believed. For those considering A2 as well (few few...sparsely few): imagine literature but in Chinese. Not that difficult except we'll have to study lit terms in Chinese. And of course Chinese essay writing.

Today marked a milestone, the struggle is out. And I'm overjoyed to be freed of its guilt and shame. Thank God for the strength to share it with some others. Of course, temptation and past guilt still haunts, but slowly, the power of God will overcome it for sure. Recently, God has been speaking to me so strongly, so surely, thank God, and I found out that what it takes is just a pure and earnest heart to hear God. Hallelujah.

God Bless for the week ahead.

My cousin is out! Welcome to the world Elijah! What a powerful name. What powerful connotations, may God bless you richly Elijah, for a fulfilling and Godly life ahead! For the Glory of the Lord! Amen!

4.9 Role Call (Register 16-27)

(and we proceed, before I slip into what is known as procrastination)

Derek Lim
Another one from the Lim Clan. The one with the splutz aura. So many memories with ya. SMP in Sec 3 when we struggled through the biofilm and the endless failures in experimenting together. Soccer when I always tried to lobang you, and you eventually found a way to stop it, unleashing your splutz powers upon me. Nights in Shanghai, and almost everywhere possible, since we were one register number apart. The Harmonizing, the time spent on the piano, the music shared and mutually enjoyed. World Cup finals at your place. Will always remember you for that maturity and those well-thought answers to situations. You calm and steadiness even through crisis. Thanks a million.

Eliel Lim
Another Lim Clanner...but not exactly. Well remembered for dozing off at the most inappropriate times, but equally well remembered for those bursts of inspiration during Lit class! Behind that waterboy-rugger facade lay a very creative mind. Also, who could forget his unique music :P Towards the end of the year, quick feet contributed much to the GEP soccer revolution.

Samuel Loke
Wasn't the closest of friends, but he always sat behind me. Another prefect who perhaps never was. But was inspiring on the soccer pitch. Wish he had come more to BB, perhaps we would have got to know each other better. But we were quite different I guess, personality wise and all, and that hindered any connection. Still, will be remembered for those times in primary school: drawing 'Anipets' the gamebook, and going over to your place to do up that comic for SS. haha.

Kevin
Darren's closest confidant. Weren't close at all, and in all honesty, I thought you were a little strange. Yet, Bio must have helped to bring us a little closer, and soon I realised that you would make a faithful friend, albeit a sticky one (who always called upon me at the most inconvenient moments). Nexus Nexus, SK, SK. That helped as well. And the roughest tackler on the pitch, not to be messed with.

Sean Lim
What to say? Another Lim Clanner. The only faithful Art Club member who followed me through those tumultous years which eventually saw the collapse of our well-loved 'interest group'. We shared the joys of OM together, we played Fifa and owned with Henry on your comp, we tried to form a band, and tried to practice at your place (recall 'Open Up the Gates?). The drummer, at the heart of the rhythm, though he played with an injured right knee (I always forgot which side it was). Bdae party (though i gave the lousiest presents). and the generous giver of the class soccer ball (yellow Nike one). Sorry we got your soccer ball lost to Azman. And who could forget the camper at the opponent's goal.

Tien En
As Fab had mentioned, my fiercest competitor in the exam hall. and he beat me to shreds this year i guess, except for LangArts (oops...what happened?). Remembered for skipping hair checks and coming later just to miss them. Remembered for phoning me during the exam period to query about exam topics. Remembered for over-worrying about the exams with me. Remembered for spontatneously acing the debates with Justin and I. And was the one with the shredded pants :)

Kaijun
Another Chinese Lover. Computer whiz. Enjoyed lessons with Phuan as well. The one who loved physics and math for real (I can't say the same about the former for myself), the one who knew so much yet always did not perform as well in the exams. Another than that, we had some short chats, some memorable times at Bio class. But we could have been closer I guess. Sigh. Always a cheerful helper on the net (since he was mostly always online)

Fabriz
Affectionately known as Fab (you cannot call him 'briz', that's for his parents and if you do he gets mad with you). Stop reading my mind fab. Anyway. Was always the guy I had to sit next to helplessly as he emo-ed away (sometimes over minute issues), but tried to stay faithful to you all the way. the 'best friends' promise in Primary 1 has hopefully not faded away, and we recall those times like the 1C vs 1D fight, the wallet soccer in the cupboard play area, the tennis ball soccer at Ah Hood Road, and finally, the real deal on the astro. BB was so much more exciting with you around (come back won't you?). Always the prolific leader in so many aspects (SK, BB, just to name a few). Newcastle fan. We will always be in each others heart (aww..soppy liao.)

David (Bong)
Because of Mr Jasbir Singh, forever labelled as Bong, and affectionately so. Was the quietest in class, BB and everywhere. Never got to know him, till one day fab and I found him in a library, silently checking a blue screen (SK), and hiding it in secret. Nightshade, Oceanic Core. We tried to smuggle food for Fab from the buffet in Shanghai only to be caught :(. The fastest runner of 4.9, the crazy guy on the soccer pitch. More recently, thanks for becoming more open and chatting more with me, and we've had some meaningful chats outside of games and SK. Hope to continue knowing ya better. Primers!

Clarence Wu
Struggled with Amath, Ding's partner, but I tried to help my best as well. Silent and still, but terrifying apparently. One of those I never got to know intimately, or perhaps even superficially, but nevertheless, one I will remember for those terrible legends in the dark.

Daniel Yeang
And it's pronounced YE-ANG. Avid Leeds and Championship supporter (subject to change once Leeds are promoted to the Premiership). The most serious prefect perhaps, who caught me for eating in class, but was ousted by the Student council, even losing his job as the 'Let's sing our school anthem' person. Always a joy to be around, and always ready to produce a couple of puns and jokes. The funny guy, who I wanted to know better but couldn't. Will remember you though! For all the times we (tried) to have together.


And that ends it. 4.9 Role call done. We look forward now to the new year ahead. And let our blogposts be a testimony to the bond we share. And may we always stay in each others' hearts!

Impromptu Goodbye

Still stuck in that mood. Perhaps it's ian's music. Impromptu goodbyes, and just like this piece, impromptu. I could never replicate this piece lest I went back to that same mood I was in when I was playing yesterday, during the thunderstorm and all. Aww...(yes you can hear the thunder gurgle within the first 10 seconds). Forgive the mistakes, forgive the fuzziness. Haha. All the screwups are like when one messes up the goodbye. sigh.

Btw. I still I'll leave a jukebox on my blog, on the right panel with the rest of the stuff. And yes, i'll include ian's piece :)

-=Impromptu Goodbye=-

enjoy. And comments haha..if anyone comes that is :D

4.9 Role Call (Register 1 to 15)

(well...I thought I'd better do this...for remembrance's sake. Don't forget below k? There's a piano piece I wish to share)

And so the roll call begins. For every name, a few memories. Let's begin. Register number-wise, in no order of merit (unless you love Arjun so).

Arjun Naidu:
Affectionately known on the soccer pitch as Black Lightning. Faster than a bullet. Spectacles always seem to come loose during soccer. Top boy in Tamil (arguably it is true). The true meaning of multi-racialism in this class. We used to tease him about his facial and bodily hair, but that has simmered down as well. No racist jokes in this class (hopefully). Quite intelligent as well.

Chen Ted Kin:
The embodiment of Okwonkwo, not to be messed with on the pitch, though occasionally he gets the ball and runs fast circles around the pitch only to get nowhere. Mighty mouse perhaps, vertically challenged but incredibly strong. Piper, fan of the Scots, Sword of Honor. Wow. 4000 years in the making, known for his many years spent on earth, and wisdom as a result.

Daryl Lim:
Finds me annoying, as with all his other friends, haha. Big thinker, I find it difficult following his blog posts at times. Head Librarian, lover of his Mother Tongue. Hierophant is his blogging alias. Well-read, well-versed, admired for his analytical nature (which i'm oft too bubbly to embrace). Or maybe it's just me who admires. And always makes me feel so shallow k? :P

Ding Si Yan:
Very missed. Left in June with his family. Lover of nature, recycled paper, crumpled sheets, writings in pencil. Used to talk on the phone for hours...haha. Missed those times, pity he had to leave in our last year together. Was always the magic touch on the soccer field, with his flicks and tricks, yet remaining completely humble at all times. Found me 'doggy', I guess that's why I'm unbearable at times. Taught me to walk down the stairs two steps at a time, always walked at my running pace, and was always HiDING somewhere. Come back soon Ding!

Elliot Tan:
Whenever there was some problem with the teacher's computer, MR boy! Used to be known as the Elliot Moose thing, which was quite some time ago...hmmm. Always a pleasure to have in class, adding his humorus antics, his whacky presentations. Sat behind me for most part of the year. Wasn't the closest of friends, but appreciated very much for that sense of humor.

Eric Lee:
Leaving soon, We'll miss you! But not for your grumpiness or emo-ness, but for all the times you were bubbly and livened up the class atmosphere. Stay close to God, stay cheery, and may you be blessed greatly in wherever you go! Lover of guitars as well, always seeking to strum on my guitar whenever I brought it along. Use your talents and glorify Christ! Stay Positive!

Gea ChongWee:
As I've mentioned before, disturbing. Had the dubious honor of sitting next to him during Sec 2. Kept touching me and left me emotionally and psychologically scarred. Non-Christian, but I tried, sowing some seeds, that will hopefully grow in future years. Odd, but nevertheless one of those who would make a great and faithful friend, sensitive to your needs especially when you're down. Hilarious at times as well...don't we all agree?

Philip Goh:
Trend-setter. Whether it was chess, the mass transfer chess craze of Sec 2, or the Rubik's Cube or this year, or simply continuing the trend of SK, he was always the driving force. Not to forget, a quick learner, who always beats his masters in the end (DOTA, SK...endless examples). The 'Malay' (still i don't know why). I remember fab and I accusing him for cheating on SK last time...haha...that caused some rifts, but everything is fine now (note: in retrospect, it was probably something bred out of a blend of envy and paranoia...nothing against phil, nor any accusations here, I felt he was innocent at the very end). :D Thanks for teaching me F2L and the whole solving thing.

Kenneth Ho:
Kenny Kenny. The most faithful French student who lasted through 4 years of torment. Slips into occasional bouts of emo-ness (who doesn't?). Had a blast during IBA with Kenny and Fab. Probably my greatest soccer buddy, as we built up for nothingness to the standard we are at now (which is arguably better). Always colliding with me on the soccer pitch, and always nutmegging me as well. We grew together, and aimed for the top-right corner of the goal post together, and missed together. More recently, the DOTA master. But let's not remember each other for games, but for the friendship.

Ian Lim:
Memories of Lim Clan stream back in. The elf with the big ears. The guitarist. The pianist. The soloist during busking. And who could forget that busking? where we played and amused ourselves in a little underpass in Orchard. We tickled each other, and got annoyed with one another. Dengue fever some time ago. More recently, we've not been as close as in Sec 2, but still, I hope the friendship will live on. Enjoyed the laughs. Llama. PangSai. Itchy. Pomelo. We will never forget.

Joash Ee:
My 5 sitting partners for the second half of the year. Surprisingly good friend, and we had the chance to grow closer this year. White hairs and wisdom. And i guess our trust grew to a point that he allowed me to pluck out one of those silver hairs yesterday. Goalkeeper potential, great and fast tackler. Loves to eat. I recall the primary school 'stomach battles'.

John Chen:
Absent more often than not. I'm sure everyone will remember him for that. Came to me for all the Biology help, if not went to Tien. Tall and outstanding, he was a Literature whiz in the Sec 2 Lit exam. I think he would be excellent if not for that poor attendance record. Went all the way to almost the Semi-finals in the inter-class soccer some time ago, pulling off 2 fine saves :D.

Darren:
Always one of the lonely ones. I tried to get to know him, having sat next to him for some time this year (if my memory does not fail me). We got to know each other mostly through those gatherings at Ken Wei's place, those sleepless nights and endless gaming. Closest buddy in class Kevin. Fab's Love Hina source toward the end of the year. DOTA (sand) King. Opened up more as time went by, and I managed to chat a little yesterday, albeit too late. Still, would make a pleasant friend I guess.

Justin Lee:
One of those bubbly kids, but a tragic family background at that. I think I had some relation to him, my dad knowing either his mum or aunt. Well, for such a guy, angsty in secret, but always bringing joy to the classroom. We had times of chatting whilst walking back to our homes (Dover Park View and Heritage View). Debated alongside him. Well known for spontaneous outbursts. And OM debut as some sweeper guy :P.

Patrick Leow:
Or the starfish. The prefect who never was. Join IB k? I guess I never got to knew him well, except in the Kluang camp this year. haha. The rugby T-shirt thing.

(and now...a break...nostalgia is time and energy consuming I guess.)

4.9 Diaspora

And so it is. The end of that long and fun-filled Secondary 4 road. The beginning of new times and challenges ahead. I've composed a piece, hmmm, in fact, it was from quite some time ago, but it sounded so appropriate for this moment. 'Journey To Light', as named aptly by Fab. and Fab mentioned it sounded like a train ride. To which i was quite surprised, but upon hearing it again, it did sound like a train ride: and before me appeared the painting of a train, chugging along into the distant sunset. Slowly, and in melodramatic fashion. (again..bear with the fuzziness)

-=Journey To Light=-

Imagine, all of us, travelling on another journey to light. One day we'll meet again, in school, in heaven, for an eternity :D

And I will do some shoutout thing later. Just to remember everyone in class. But for now, I'll leave this piano piece, and some lyrics below.

The Blessing
Steven Curtis Chapman

Let's not say another word, we don't need to question why.
Let us pass through this moment like a candle in the night.
We don't need to wave it back.
This is not the final song.
Even though in the sadness tears may fall.

Take my smile, hold it in your heart forever.
And I will be with you wherever you may go.

How much pain must we taste.
How much sorrow must we know.
Will be only nothing losing.
How to cherish when we go.
How agony is like the wind we can hold it in our hands.
In the light of a new day we will understand.

Take my smile, hold it in your heart forever.
And I will be with you wherever you may go.

May the road rise to meet you on your way.
May the sun always shine upon your face.
And until the journey brings us back together.
May God hold you in the center of His hands.


bye 4.9 2006, we will miss each other, but it won't be an eternity

Shanghai Memories

As the school year comes to a close, one can only start reminiscing about the events of the past two years, the fun we had together, the laughter we shared, the scoldings we endured together. Something inspired me sometime back, a musical piece (perhaps you might call it that), something that struck me while I was on the piano. I thought i might as well share it with all - as I hope I will do with all future compositions.

Well, as one listens to this, just think back, relax and enjoy the air of nostalgia. And don't play it too loud, because in all honesty the sound quality can still be improved, and it is fuzzy at times :D

comments appreciated, as always (I'm starting to feel like I'm posting a blogskin):

-=Shanghai Memories=-

If you love it so much (I doubt so though), you could right-click and save link as :)

till next time...

我愿变成童话里...

sigh. The karaoke competition today could have been much much better (and that's being very nice already). With all honestly i did look forward to a repeat of last year's karaoke competition, where the whole old auditorium was filled with songs and music and singing, and the 'wow!' atmosphere. But it didn't happen.

The music was kind of muffled for the most part. Was Derek doing the MR? haha splutz. I felt quite bad for the singers on stage, as they (arguably) embarassed themselves on stage, singing out of tune, or trying desperately to hear themselves and the music in the background. Mdm Loo and I exchanged puzzled looks (or was it sympathy). Either way, everyone was quite disappointed.

Still we had an OK time singing along when the music finally became fine (haha during the bubble blowing performance). And the stunning teacher performances.

Bought a Chinese book today. Cross my fingers and hope I get down to reading.

On another note, soccer was qutie interesting today. Phil scored two goals in a minute. Bong tried hard not to laugh.

Hamachi + Dota + Kenny + Darren = quite fun indeed. Just praying that I don't get addicted. There has to be a limit I guess :D

Results day tomorrow. De-day. God Bless. :D

The Sleeve Issue

And so, in recent years, people have started to notice Tim for a very odd habit, of pulling up his shirt sleeves. Many of us question why such a person would do such a very odd thing. After all, he is perhaps the only guy (arguably it is true) in the whole school who does such a thing. Why then? Another one of those mysteries of life that we should try to delve into.

Perhaps some form of childhood trauma has caused him to develop in such a way, perhaps somewhere along his life he met with some scarring tragedy. People with traumatic childhood experiences have been found out to be more prone to adopting or developing queer habits.

Not that the strange folding of sleeves is wrong, it is just wrong for any guy in his right mind to do such a thing, after all it is only the girls who do such a thing. Yet Tim seems least bothered by such a fact, and continually and stubbornly does it. It is a strange phenomena indeed. I wish I knew why too.

Maybe it is for comfort, maybe it is more comfortable to have your sleeves up. How can that be so - you may ask. But perhaps different people feel differently about different things.

But ultimately, as with all mysteries, we can only speculate, and wonder and think up of all the reasons we could possibly conjure. But ultimately, and in the end, perhaps the only conclusion we can make is that Tim is different from the rest (in other words. Weird).

Let's keep tugging down on his sleeves to remind him, shall we?

Rendezvous at MacRitchie

(Warning: Long narrative-like post ahead)

Word of the day (or these few days) would probably 'rendezvous'.

In classic fashion, trying to use a big word, Tim told Derek that he had a secret rendezvous on Wednesday, and had to leave soccer early as a result. Needless to say, being 'his usual smart self', Tim pronouned the word as it was spelt, the full three syllables. 'Ren' (rhyming with 'Ben'), 'Dez' (the 'e' as pronouned in 'mess'), and 'Vous' (as in mischievous). That was quite amusing, and it cracked Derek up. Soon the news was spread to the whole world.

How was one to know that it was a French word!? Kenny was there to teach me the next day at MacRitchie SL, we did have a fun French lesson, even as Kenny was musing over the Third Language lesson which he was missing that afternoon. In greater mockery of my wrong pronunciation, the Raffles girls were all wearing T-shirts (yes sean...with 'tim-style' folded sleeves) with the bolded words 'Raffles' Rendezvous' printed across. Derek was the first to point it out...not surprisingly.

So, perhaps I should comment a little on the whole SL experience. It wasn't too bad. But so few people went. And it was quite disappointing in that sense. Expected more, but there were so many things to be done, people had so many appointments, people had so many other important things to be done, people didn't feel like coming, people went overseas, people had issues to tend to, or people were just bo-chap. No offence to anyone in particular, let's just leave 'people' as 'people' in general and not go around pointing fingers now (we cannot forget that when one points a finger, he points three at himself)

In a word, it was tiring. The walk from Venus Drive, past the scenic route, with the winding road, the country club, the long grass, the lone jackfruit hanging from the tree, the occasional caterpillar thing climbing up the silken thread, the tortise, and the 'food-snatching monkeys, was just long and almost weary. The first day started off on a terrible note. Not having a handphone, it was uncustomary of me to take down the handphone number of anyone, so I did not have Benjamin's (the Big Leader Guy's) number. Unfortunately this meant waiting an eternity for them to arrive. We limboed under the road blocking thing, played carnival games (tossing wood into tree trunk holes from afar), to keep ourselves busy. But eventually still had to walk into the park by ourself.

At least the air-conditioned room was a comforting reception. We were introduced to the map of the tree-top walk, and how we were to set up the 100m by 200m plot of land for a research project - The research project being a census of the tree species present in the tropical rainforest. It was to 'inventorise', monitor tree dynamics and reach out to the public, so i guess in it's own funny way it was 'service-learning'. We were to set up the plot of land, using the tree-top walk bridge as the middle guide.

And so we set off, with white long spars, tent pegs, mallets, raffia, water bottles in hand. Splitting into two groups. Sean, Phil and Kenny went up to the bridge to drop raffia lines as gauges for the points along the bridge (25m, 50m, 100m, 150m, 175m). Bong (or Boone), Ian, Chongwee and I took the bottom of the bridge, and were to receive these lines and peg them down into the ground. Needless to say, we had a blast trying to position the lines at a perpendicular to the ground. Was more difficult considering we were working along a slope, and the lines were being dropped from like 50m above :P.

We placed our water bottles in a little corner at the foot of a tree trunk. An hour later, Ian claimed they were infested by ants.

After this ardous task, we were asked to walk outwards 50m to the left and right of the bridge, perpendicularly, in order to get the 100m width of the plot (recall the raffia that was dropped from above was to obtain the points of lengthwise distance in the middle of the plot). We had like 100m long measuring tape that had snapped off at midway between 32m (oh gosh...i still remember these details). With the measuring tape in hand, we walked 50m straight into the forest to the left first. Of course we had the help of Naga.

Which brings us to the rangers (don't get excited Bong) - Janet (da jie jie) and Christopher (Tarzan Boy). Plus they had the secret weapon Naga, with the parang. We all thought it was an inanimate object till we realised that Naga was an Indian worker there. Decked in blue t-shirt and wielding a parang, speaking broken english. Undoubtedly one of our best pals by the end of the two days.

So Naga hacked and we followed, and Ian and I emerged into this clearing with (lo and behold) lots and lots of pitcher plants!!! There were countless of them, apparently the sort that, with some decoration could probably fetch a price of close to ten dollars. It was a moment filled with amazement. Following that, we planted the second white pole into the soil.

The third pole was pretty much the same, but we went the other way, and it was tougher...a little. And so the third ian was planted in (we called the poles 'ian' because they were long, white and thin...amazing stuff!)

Then Benjamin came for quality check, and realised that we were seriously seriously off for the first pole. Ian sighed. I sighed. We knew we had to redo it. This time we were taught to use a compass. I still remember those horrible bearings (022, 112, 202, 292). I think we did a better job the second time, though all in all we had walked a total of more than 400m through the dense foilage. We finally got some rest later.

That was Ian and I. Chongwee and Bong were further outward from the ranger station, pegging in the remaining tent pegs along the bridge. I decided to pay the rest a visit - those on the bridge. When I found them, they were staring into space, horribly tired. Well, that's expected. Honestly, we had it worse...(but everyone thinks that of themselves), but admittedly they had got more sun. Either way, Chongwee was belting out the loudest, and he sounded like one of those exotic birds of paradise in the forest. Bong remained calm and silent even though he was next to the most agitated person of our gang.

Lunch was fine. Chicken rice (i still don't get the joke). Chilli (thanks for that Kenny...). We were recharged...maybe....but that was when everything turned emo...especially Kenny...

(to be continued - for time reasons....yes it is 12 midnite now)