If you think being smart if fun, you should read on coz it's not true.......

Being smart is crummy, ask ian for example, basically you start getting top in everything, no problem, but it always feels kinda pai seh when you have to use a tray to collect all your awards on Founders Day....and it puts lots of pressure on yourself and people have super high expectations of you. Why can't i be normal, i'm just like everyone else ya? I just mug harder, in fact my IQ isn't fantastic, ppl like ChongWee have IQs higher than me. I'm not naturally smart or intelligent, its just mugging, hard work and dilligence, if only ppl could distinguish btw the 2.

Take today for example, i messed up for lit paper, got 13/25, btw thats 52/100, which is a fail in 'GEP standards'. Sure i get a little upset and all, and then Ferdinand Quek tells us he was lenient, wad's that supposed to mean, that i actually got like wad...10/25.....Not that that's not enuff, ppl are getting like 19/25, even 21/25 (John lah, so tall....) !!! I wrote a whole lot of crap and i get 13....i think nxt time i'll write like super short and to the point lah...if that's wad they want. The assignment was graded, i'm dead lah, better do better for reading assignment or i si liao.

Being smart isn't gd because of ppl 'sakar-ing' you ALL THE TIME. Lemme name a handful of such ppl, hmmm: fish, jlo (and his routine of bowing down to you, ding shld know....), john (during Bio class....he says like 'tim is my new best fren'), and so many many more ppl (suspect sloke at times too). In fact i don't even know who's my real fren and who's just trying to sakar me to squeeze answers outta me. I can't trust anyone liao....its annoying when ppl associate everything of you with the word "good" like daniel....'wow blogging is SO COOL coz tim does it'.....haiz, i dunno wad to do liao. I have no real frens do i? As ian said b4, i guess i'm just a doormat being used by ppl. Its kinda unfair.....at least some ppl appreciate me for my personality and all, and the most unlikely ppl as well, ppl like Chong Wee....

And when you do badly in sth, ppl are shocked, like wad, issit wrong for me not to get top in class, issit wrong for me to make a mistake, to make a spelling error? OF COURSE NOT? so why can't i make mistakes without being bothered by ppl? And during tests, ppl go CRAZY when they beat me in tests, wad's the deal bout me? I don' t mind being beaten, its just that i mind ppl making such a commotion over it...(i remember genhuong when he beat me in geog......)

I was quite unhappy today, at least my tuition teacher had diarheoa, so no tuition......my mum keeps complaining that i use the com too much, well its just schwrk, and yeah from now on i'll play less then....sigh, i'm so useless lah. State of depression soon, better be careful, somehow i'm starting to despise myself so i better stop myself.....

well better luck tomorrow, maybe it'll be a better day...