happysad moments (: ):

God's been great. aye. what more can i say.

people have told me - that tim you've changed - yes other than the fact that i seem to lose increasing amounts of weight, tim has changed to become less of the crazy-screw loose chap or the yesteryears. but i guess change was inevitable, sobering up was simply to come. aiya i think i spend too much time thinking and too much time alone.

suggestion perhaps to daydream more and to let my mind go wild again, spend time sliding on the imaginary slides fabricated in the mind, swing up and down, wind through your hair, try in vain to make your way across those playground monkey bar things - never was much of a chimp myself. slipslidinsplendid times in the imaginary playground of the mind. it's been a long time since i've awakened that me, and he seems to be sitting alone in the playground, waiting for his playmate to return..

why have i grown to love the rain, the splatter against the body, the sound of melted drops of cirrus; seems so depressing. so melancholic. my dad says i should play more songs in the major keys, but i tell him that wouldn't be me. minor keys minor keys are what make the world go round. you cannot have happy without sad. nor sad without happy.

and you have to settle for happysad moments

happysad moments defined by a sense of happiness followed by the aftertaste of sadness. or sometimes a strange sense of gratitude and glee proceeds from initial bouts of sadness. happysad happysad, happy comes first though, it's not merely alphabetical, does it not make sense? that happy should always take the first place.

joy in the Lord. joy in the Lord. O grant us joy and direction for the LTC camp Lord. Where would we be without you? I don't think the Lord would want to hide stuff from His children, so we just have to be there to listen to His plan. and yield to it.

(oh a side note. bb was oh so happy today. happy bdae Fab (:. happy BB-initiation day eve. and happysad day to me)

today my cousin and i spoke whilst walking laps around the koi pond - this thing about koi ponds amazes me, though our school pond has dropped in terms of visibility, but the fish swim happily maybe that's what matters - but we shared much, and realized how much we were struggling alongside each other - and we did pray eventually, that God would take precedence in everything.

I'm walking on sunshine. class dance. i got really twisted yesterday. i think it was a tough dance, even John Tay couldn't do it - ok i don't know why i use John as a standard but i shall. and we shall room together, i don't care (:

ok i shall end on this heavy-eyed note (: thanks God